Why We Think, Feel, And Act The Way We Do
For as long as I can remember, I have always been caught up in my thoughts.
I never really considered what it was that I was thinking and how it effected me. I just thought that this is the "normal," when in fact, unfortunately, it is normal to most of the world. It wasn't until college where I was having psychological symptoms and all my gut/insomnia problems (that are described this blog), where I started to realize this suffering needed to stop.
I had the problem of thinking too much and I was always constantly thinking. I saw psychiatrists and psychologists trying to tell me that it was anxiety and depression related.
And so that's why I made this article (and video), so you can figure out where your psychology is right now. And mainly where all your thoughts are coming from. So let's dig deeper and get to the bottom of all this. Maybe you'll be able to rewire how you think (think HRV related).
Let's start with BEHAVIOR:
To get results, sometimes the problem with getting something done isn't not knowing what to do, but It's usually just not wanting to do it.
For example, saying:
"I know I have a 100 more calls to make and can make a lot of sales, but it's Friday afternoon, eh, I'm not going to do that."
So it is not as important to focus on behavior, but focus on...
WHY DO WE DO WHAT WE DO?
If you really want to change performance, you have to get a grip with what's happening to you on the inside.
How you think is what you do.
So if we think of our mind like a layer cake, we have our conscious mind, unconscious mind, feelings, emotions, and physiology. In that order.
Our conscious mind is what we feel as thoughts. That is actually controlled by our unconscious mind. Our unconscious mind is made up of our past experiences and beliefs. So let's say if someone has gotten rejected over the years multiple times, their conscious mind will probably make them consciously or unconsciously think of themselves as a reject. That's why it's a good idea to build a structured mindset that rejection is for success.
So how you think is really effected by how you feel. Thinking effects feeling and feeling effects thinking. It goes backwards and forwards in a loop. But the dominant factor really is feeling. So if you want to change what you or other people do, you have to change the way you or they feel. Feeling has a much more significant impact on thinking than the other way around. So if you feel anxious, it's probably no good for me to say "don't worry." You'll probably get a sarcastic answer like "oh yeah, don't worry then...I hadn't thought of that.'' So if you feel anxious, you think anxious.
Our raw emotion drives how we feel.
Raw emotion is dependent on what is going on with your brain - HPA axis, MAO activity, diet and so on can influence this. Essentially, your neurotransmitters and hormones effects your brain which effects your raw emotion. All the signals from your body interact with your brain to give you raw emotion.
Most people don't realize feelings and emotions aren't the same thing. In fact, most people don't even realize that feelings and thinking aren't the same thing, particularly men, right? So if you ask a man how they feel, they will tell you how they feel because they don't understand the question.
Emotions are just energy in motion. What is even more fundamental than emotion is physiology.
Every action and inaction your body takes creates your physiology. That could be walking, running, sitting, being in pain, hunger, eating a large meal and so on. So these signals can travel up the chain to change your conscious mind.
An interesting way to change your state is with power poses.
What is some easy ways to change your physiology?
1. Heart Rate Variability
Heart rate variability (HRV) is relative to how our body reacts to stress. So in times of heavy stress our heart will have an increase in heart rate and flutter, and when we relax relax, our heart rate will decrease, and you will be in flow. So the change between the two is call your heart rate variability. When we can control heart rate variability, we can control our physiology. One way to do this is with boxed breathing.
2. Boxed Breathing
Boxed breathing is very easy and essentially just breathing in the same amount of time that it takes to hold your breath, hold it, breath out, and hold that (no air).
So for example you could breath in for five seconds, hold it for five seconds, exhale for five seconds, and then hold nothing in your lungs for five seconds. Then repeat.
This will change your heart rate variability and is the easiest way to accomplish it.
Thanks guys for reading and stay beautiful!